"Persuasive" Secrets!

Recently, I found a new area of Interest and that was behavioral science. There was a reason behind it. A few days ago I got a call from a Real Estate Agency as I was looking for a house in Mumbai. The real estate agency was registered on the same housing website as I was so it was easy for them to track me and my requirements (Analytics in play :P) .  The agent was so fluent and concurring that I could not say no to his request. So, after the phone call I thought was this offer to my benefit? or he had the perfect skills to make me say yes to his request. So I thought of digging deep into this topic.

I found out that researchers have been studying the factors to say yes to the request of others and there can be no doubt that there is a science in how we are persuaded. The science is surprising. In making the decision we may feel that people consider all the options and information they have. But, the reality is very often different.

In the increasingly overloaded life we live, more than ever, we need shortcuts or rules of thumb to guide our decision making. We humans can't possibly think through every situation from scratch, so we also have "triggers" that set off automatic, unthinking action. Our brain is built to help us simplify life by identifying patterns moment-by-moment, and automatically setting in motion set sequences of standard, well-rehearsed behavior.

Someone says "Good morning" to you, and without thinking, you say it back. You see a red sign at a signal, and you automatically stop your car (or at least slow down). A group of people around you laugh, and you laugh right along even if you didn't hear the joke.

Human triggers and patterns of response are more varied and complex, and certainly less predictable. And people are more aware than ever of the manipulative nature of selling and advertising. However, if you can discover the most powerful human behavior sequences and find the thing that triggers them, you can lead people to say "yes" to your requests more often.

So after some observations and initial studies and references I want you to take you through just 6 of these shortcuts that guide our behavior.

They are.

1. Reciprocity

2. Scarcity

3. Authority

4. Consistency

5. Liking

6. Social Proof

By implying these shortcuts in ethical manner there is a high chance that someone may get persuaded by your request. Let us understand these 6 factors with a few examples.

1. Reciprocity : Simply put , People are obliged to give back to others the form of behavior, gifts or service that they have received first. If a friend invites you to their party then there is an  obligation for you to invite them to the future party you are hosting. If a colleague does you a favor then you owe that colleague a favor. In the context of the social obligation people are likely to say yes to those to they owe. One of the best demonstration I can tell you is that of the restaurant. The last time I had visited a restaurant for a birthday party of my friend the waiter gave him the small birthday gift (A box of 3 cookies) on behalf of the restaurant. They did this when they brought the bill. The tip that he gave was twice than what he could have given earlier. So here is the question does the giving of that gift had any influence of him giving that tip ? Many people will say NO! But let me tell you that this small gift can make a surprising difference in your decision making. Either you will give a high tip or the probability of you visiting that restaurant again is very high. It is because you owe them an another visit. You not influenced by what was given but by how It was given. So, the key to use principle of reciprocation is be, the first to give and give something unexpected and personalized.

2. Scarcity : People want more of those things that they can have less of. When Indigo announced that they will have just one flight from Kolkata to Pune instead of two daily, the sales increased!

The airfare was constant, time required to travel was same, the service did not change so what made this increase in sales ? It was because it had become a scarcity. When there was a news that onions in Maharashtra were scarce that was the time when demand suddenly increased. When you look for a career and you find out that "XYZ" professionals / resources are scarce in the industry right now, you choose to prefer that career path. When a thing is scarce people want it more.

So, when it comes to effectively persuading others with the principle of scarcity , the science is clear. It is not enough to tell people the benefits of your products or services. You will need to point out what is unique in your offering and what they stand to loose.

3. Authority : This principle is based on the idea that people follow the credible knowledgeable experts. Physiotherapists can persuade patients with their recommended exercises if they display their medical degree on the walls of their clinic. People will easily give parking charge to the one with uniform instead of casual clothing although both of them are complete strangers. What it tells us is it is important to  signal to others what makes you a credible and knowledgeable authority before you make your influence attempts. Of course, this could pose problems if you go on telling your customer that how brilliant you are. But, you can arrange someone to do it for you. That is the reason for arranging the reception staff. When the receptionist tells you that let me connect you to our subject matter expert who has the experience in this field for 16 years. You suddenly feel that he is going to make your decision easy. So to persuade, you must let know the credentials of the man who is going to assist or help the other person making decision.

4. Consistency : Consistency is a valuable adaptive behavior. Socially and personally, consistency is beneficial, a practical survival skill in a complex world. Doing things the same way time and time again, or maintaining the same ideas about things, gives us helpful shortcuts.

Consistency makes thinking easy, because there's little thinking needed. Make up your mind about something once, and you never have to think about it ever again. Faced with new situations, you simply recall how you handled it before and the problem is solved. When the Rule of Consistency is triggered, decisions are made almost automatically.

In addition to simplifying our thinking, Consistency also helps us avoid unpleasant emotions. It helps us stick to what we know and avoid the chance of disappointment, embarrassment, failure, and loss.

Consistency can be activated by making small initial commitments or asking for small initial commitments. people are not only driven to "be" consistent, but are also driven to "appear to be" consistent. That's because, socially, consistency is a desirable personal trait. It is seen as rational, trustworthy, stable, and decisive. Inconsistency, on the other hand, is usually frowned upon. It is seen as irrational, deceptive, unstable, and indecisive.

Think about the people you most admire. Aren't most of them remarkably "consistent" in their actions and beliefs? Don't they seem incredibly decisive and sure?

5. Liking :  No matter how reasonable we may think ourselves to be, we are always more likely to say "yes" to those we know and like. We readily comply with requests from those who are similar to us and for whom we have good feelings. It's what makes refusing to buy Tupperware from a friend or relative next to impossible. There are 3 important factors while we like some one:

a. We like people similar to us

b. We like people who pay us compliments

c. We like people who co operate with us towards mutual goals

I still remember as an exercise during my post graduation course we were given an assignment of winning a contract. There were two different groups and naturally there were two different methodologies. First group thought time is money and so they got down to the business directly. The second group, however, started with a personal touch and then came to the point of offering. The contract was won by the second team.

6. Social Proof : Especially when confused, people will look at the action of the others before their own. recently I had chance to visit my friend in an hotel room. there was a small card in bathroom in attempt to persuade their clients to reuse their towels and napkins. They had also placed a board telling that 75 percent of their clients reused their towels and napkins. Automatically me and my friend reused the towel. Most of us are imitators in most of what we do. We look to others for guidance, especially when we are uncertain about something. We ask, "What do others think about this? What do others feel? What do others do?" Then we act accordingly. The more people who do something, the more likely it is correct — or at least relatively safe. Not always, but for most things it works with a high degree of reliability.

And when you understand the rule, you can trigger it at will to generate a "yes" response to your offers and requests. That is why Organisations display the list of satisfied customers or clients.

As I wrote this post there were many occurrences came to my mind. Occurrences when I said YES . I got to know the reason behind me saying yes and the people who were successful in persuading me. I hope you will recollect such similar incidences as well. So, next time when you say "Yes"  you will think of all these 6 factors.

Caution : Do not make your life complicated by over-thinking, it already complicated enough !!